The 5 Precepts: #4

Apr 26, 2010

In the five precepts, the fourth precept is to abstain from conduct done in lust —more specifically, not to commit adultery. This precept is especially for relationships between men and women. If while a person is in a relationship, he or she looks for another relationship, that person creates relationship karma.

That is because when one has a partner and looks for another partner, one is actually losing the faith and trust of the partner that one is with. The love then disappears, and in the end, both people blame each other and even hate each other. They can even become enemies. They create relationship karma that eventually becomes relationship “sal”.

Once one has created relationship “sal”, it is difficult to find a partner that can trust, love and care for one. At the same time, if one has children, one can pass on that kind of suffering to one’s children.

If one has too much desire for sex and commits adultery, one is actually losing one’s correct dignity as a human being. One loses oneself, and life after life, one lives a difficult life.

Sometimes because of one’s many previous lives, one has relationship karma, so in this life, one meets an uncomfortable partner that one has to deal with. One often lives a life full of suffering. If one is in such a situation with one’s partner, both people should strive not to make each other suffer and try to fix that relationship karma correctly.

But if the couple is not able to work it out, no matter how hard they try, then it is wiser to take a rest from that connection relationship, instead of going through more difficulties. While the couple is taking some space from one another, they should look within themselves to see what their mistakes were. Once they find what they did wrong and are able to fix these points, they can try again. That is the best method.

But even though the couple tries this method, if they are unable to fix their problems, and if that connection relationship is only going to continue to hurt and harm each other, it may be wiser for each other’s happiness to stop that connection-relationship. Doing so will help to prevent the couple from creating more relationship karma. I would say that this is a wise method. What do you think?

P.S. The last paragraph is not an option for eternal couples.

What I am teaching you is not new. You heard about it before in either this or a past life. This daily teaching is simply to remind us so that we can be clear and live correctly in this and future lives. Believing this teaching is entirely the decision of the one who reads it. In addition, applying one’s own concept to this teaching is the choice of the reader himself or herself. © Ji Kwang Dae Poep Sa Nim